Mylok the Markenschtein here enjoys fresh spring water, as good as anything you could buy at the store, pouring out of a pvc pipe from the side of the mountain road on the way to Hayfork.
We took Big Ball by storm. S.W.A.T. (Smashed, Wasted, and Trashed) was the home team we were rooting for, and they made it worthwhile. Whereas they may not have won, they provided us shade and alcohol in the now infamous "Club Bubb" -- the back of Bubba's pickup truck. I drank maybe 2/3 a jug of Sangria and we ate the Philly Tri Tip Dip sandwiches recommended to us by sleeveless redneck Frank.
We rapped with Luke, who essentially speaks in rhyming couplets. People spent much time getting high and talking with Analisa's folks, and we learned to crack a bullwhip. I couldn't get the gunshot snap that I wanted, but I had good accuracy.
Part Two: The Fire Trail
Until I hurt my hip sleeping outside in Hayfork, and aggravated it by doing more of the same, I had been (and will now continue) running the fire trail everyday. There's not much to say here. You feel the complete solace and isolation of a hike with the satisfaction of good exercise. The run now takes me ~95 minutes. Not so shabby. Pictured above is the "connector" aka "heartattack hill." It is very steep, and, as you can see in the picture, is long enough that you can't see the end of it. It wrecks you. This is the agro-craig of the run, and takes place near the beginning, thank god.
Part Three: More Joaq
Joaq tore his ACL. That sucks for more reasons than I can here express. For one, it stands very directly in the way of his current goals. However, I see a couple major advantages..
a) I get more joaq. That's right sucka. I'm a selfish man. I get time with him for landmines, frisbee heckling, triple rock and a number of other activities. It is apparent that I will be seeing him at a near miles rate of visitation. Fatness. Between the winking game, games of pool, call of booty, and late night drunk bro-walks, there's a lot of reason to encourage him to get up here.
b) Joaq now may dress up like a slick pimp everyday since he don't need to work out. Look at my beautiful grammar. It is apparent I am excited.
c) Did I mention I get more joaq?
Part Four: De La Paz
Ladies of Berkeley, you may now lay your eyes upon the newest Bartender at cafe de la paz. Akon may have fallen in love with the bartender and I don't blame him. It's a pretty sexy job. I earned this position by working a catering gig in SF and earning the trust of the enigmatic man I will here call Boss-man. He is a schmoo, and kind of an odd schmoo at that. He let me borrow his car in SF, as pictured above. That's right. The center of operations drives an xxxtra sexy mid nineties camry.
I'll be working every day except thursday next week, so stop in for a drink, alright? I wear a refreshingly morbid all black outfit and make a number of exciting drinks...
a) margaritas
b) mojitos
c) mojitos
d) mojitos
e) alright, basically, no one orders anything else. but i would really appreciate it if they (and you!) did.
So that's that. Look at me, using my history degree to get people drunk. Isn't that what it's really for anyway? Uh-huh.
Part Five: Ultimate Victory
I'm not going to write anything here. Suffice to say, I feel like a million bucks today.
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