
Star Trek is also an educational experience. Some things I picked up at the Sony Metreon last night.
1. alternate realities exist, and are awesome.
in the alternate reality I live in, I am incredibly cool, make tons of money casually, never fart, and totally pilot sweet spaceships all the time. I also have ridiculously attractive women who follow me around but know they can't have me.
2. people with asperger's syndrome are actually Vulcans. incredible intelligence, sense of logic, and lack of desire for emotional expression

3. people with asperger's syndrome are quite sexy, and have hot, black xenolinguist girlfriends with awesome unspeakable names.
4. Max-Francis is also a vulcan. Not saying he has any of the above qualities. Nonetheless, it's probably true.
5. Red matter creates black holes. Should have paid better attention in Alex Filipenko's famous class, "Astro 10: Red Matter Creates Black Holes."
6. if you are having problems finding the right kind of friends, know this: your best friend will come from the future, as a creepy older man who knows a lot about you, and save you from rabid Dog-Wompas when you are abandoned on a terrible ice planet. this person is likely someone you hate, hates you and has tried to publicly persecute you in the past.
[side note: my hope is that future eugene comes in the form of a torch-waving creepy old man who knows a lot about my life and has a sexy ethnic girlfriend. pretty please!]
7. Iowa is not very cool now, but it's going to be AWESOME in the distant future.
side question for consideration: does future spock get dibs on normal spock's hot girlfriend? menage a spock?
2 comments:
Looks like the lessons we learned are about the same. One more thing though:
8. Despite not being of Scottish descent, Simon Pegg shows us once again that Scotsmen are awesome.
(side note: speaking of Scotsmen, everybody needs to read the first two paragraphs in the "Acting Career" section of the Wikipedia Sean Connery article)
9. Just because you get no action practically whatsoever in the prequel (aside from one self-referential green alien joke) does not mean that your future lies barren. Keep up hope!
Post a Comment